just some thoughts...

The weather has been amazing this weekend...even now, after dark, it's still warm and a little hazy when you walk outside. I've been walking around in a tank top and flip flops and taking my sweater off every time I even think about having it on in the sunshine.

I love the sunshine; it's been too long since I've seen it. The grass was so green, and the sky was blue and the smell of rain faded into the background to leave...spring.

Initiation was Thursday night - I'm finally a full-fledged sister of the Delta Zeta Sorority. I understand even more now about the step that I've taken. There are things I cannot share, secrets that are mine for the keeping, but the utter joy and exultation I feel just by being a part of something so spectacular is a secret that I couldn't keep if I tried...or if I even wanted to. I wish that everyone could find a place where their heart just feels so full and comfortable.

There have been so many benefits to this semester. Had I only realized during the fall just what I was missing by going home every single weekend...no wonder I didn't feel as if I belonged. I let others dictate to me what I should be and where I should go and I allowed myself to be lured into the notion that maybe coming to OWU wasn't the great thing I thought it was when I signed the forms last spring. Following that line of thought would have been one of the greatest mistakes of my life......

Ohio Wesleyan is amazing. In so many ways. I've had more of a chance to fulfill my potential as a leader in all sorts of different ways than I've ever had before. I have so many fabulous friends who are intelligent, quirky, and most of all who appreciate me for who I am rather than asking me to be something I'm most decidedly not. They don't try to change me, and they just...love me. Which is more than I can say for certain other people in my life.

So, I'm staying at OWU for the summer, working odd jobs on and off campus to make some extra money and basically stay away from home. I can't live there anymore...and I need to get ready for next summer, when my mom leaves me for Las Vegas and I move to the East Coast (hopefully Boston!) and I have to survive on my own.

Enough for now, but that's where my mind is.

Oh...and my ex boyfriend is a farshtinkener.